Working Girl

I have a summer job!
I'm so glad I have something interesting to share with you; it would have been a little difficult to write a whole post about eating an entire bag of chips by myself or getting in a fight with my mom over suitcases or any one of the other pathetic events that has characterized my life post-college.

In, the first sermon I heard after graduating, the pastor encouraged us to pray for opportunities rather than circumstances.  Not that circumstances aren't important or prayer-worth, but how often does my prayer life become a list of things that I want God to fix or heal or turn around?  Compare that to the number of times I ask God to give me an open door to share the gospel with someone.  It's not even close to being equal.

And so instead of just asking God for a job, I asked him give me a place where I can spread grace.

I don't know what that will look like or what will happen at the end of the summer, but I know where to start. In his commencement speech, Joel Richardson reminded our class that without love we are nothing.  Grace without love is just pity.  So I'm praying for love.  I want to love my coworkers, my boss, the regulars, the first-timers, the out-of-towners, the impatient, the slow, the indecisive, the loud-cellphone talkers.  

I'm not good at unconditional love, I'm good at loving the people who need it or the people I want to love me back.  This summer, I'm asking God to teach me to love the people who don't care, to whom I am nothing more than the face who makes their coffee.

Because, without love I am nothing more than a noisy gong or a clanging symbol telling them to have a nice day and not really caring if they do.

Have a Glorious Weekend

Alchemy from Henry Jun Wah Lee / Evosia on Vimeo.

I'm A Real Kid Now?

(source: Megan Church)

And just like that it's over.
Who would have thought that they would let me graduate?  You can tell from my obviously surprised face that I sure didn't.
Now typically a graduation post would have some recollections of the great times I had and the wonderful people that I'll miss, and all that is true, but I haven't really processed through all of that so I'll save that for another post.  Instead, I'll tell you about everything that comes after graduation.
While I was still in college, I would ask friends who had graduated, what's it like to be a real person?
For those of you wondering, it has been, without a doubt, one of my most uninspiring adventures yet.
Here's a little tidbit:

• While applying for summer jobs, I've begun to wish that I'd taken cosmetic or bartending classes because my college degree is pretty useless. (hire me, please?)
• To reinforce my status as an adult, my parents have graciously added me to the family "chore chart" (not that I mind helping out, but something about the word chore that brings me back to third grade).
• I am now the chief driver of our family's minivan (sexy, I know).
• In an effort to appear cooler than I actually am, I attempted to make dinner for the family using trendy ingredients like feta cheese, tilapia, and quinoa (which my mother just informed me I've been mispronouncing).  Everyone else dutiful ate it and complimented me, but I thought it was disgusting.
• I took pictures of this trendy dinner to try to be as cool as Autumn over at The Beanstalk, but they ended up looking like they were taken by a drunk five year old.
• As a result, I've given up on trying to be trendy or cool and have taken to eating mac and cheese from the box like a real grown-up.
• Like all the cool 21 year-olds out there, I spend my evenings at home with my parents doing exciting things like eating McDonald's milkshakes and watching Life of Pi (My dad's comment was: wow, they did an amazing job training that tiger).

So life after college has been all I hoped and dreamed it would be.
Really, life after college has been an exercise in gratitude.  I've never been good at thankfulness, but I'm  challenged to consider all that I do have to be thankful for. I have: a college education, a family, fresh (if not good) food, a working vehicle, and, most importantly, a God who provides graciously despite me thanklessness.

Answers to Prayer

I just sent out my first support letter. (let out breath I've been holding for weeks).
Hopefully if you're reading this you got one.  If not, you can always check out my Sich Beteiligen page.
I've also started to pray for my future residents and fellow staff members.  It's beginning to sink in that this is real.  This is not just a far, distant dream anymore. God has answered my prayers and in a few short months I'll be halfway around the world serving his church.  What?

It's frustrating how self-centered my view is.  I get so caught up in my little distractions and worries that I forget the HUGE ways God has been working in my life.  He has answered my prayers, he has provided a job, and he will provide the support.

Psalm 66

Come and hear, all who fear God, 

and I will tell what he has done for my soul.

I cried out to him with my mouth,

and high praise was on my tongue.

If I had cherished iniquity in my heart, 

the Lord would not have listened. 

But truly God has listened;

he has attended to the voice of my prayer.

Blessed be God,

because he has not rejected my prayer

or removed his steadfast love from me!

The Unexpected

I don't know why God continues to surprise me.  Don't get me wrong, I'm glad he does. But you would think that after 21 years of watching him show up in unexpected ways that I would begin to expect the unexpected.
Instead I'm like that five year old playing peek-a-boo.  Even though mom or dad has reappeared the 500 other times they've played, the child is still just as surprised as they were the first time.

I sit and I look at my brokenness and I say "It's not possible for God to use me, I'm too much of a mess" then he steps in and says

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness"

II Corinthians 12:9a

Or I remember that I'm leaving for Germany in 3 months and haven't begun to start fundraising and he reminds me that he is the one who 

" . . . is able to to far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us."

Ephesians 4: 20

I am so thankful that I serve a God who is unexpected.  I'm glad that he doesn't agree with me and he doesn't see the limitations that paralyze me with fear.  I'm relieved that I'm not as smart as I think I am.  

So I will continue to be surprised. I will revel in the unexpected.  I will play peek-a-boo. 

Have A Glorious Weekend.

 My new life goal is to find this cabin. Wanna join?

 (source unknown)